Monopoly

I’ve been buying my groceries online with Ocado (Waitrose) and Tesco. The Ocado bills are astronomical compared to that of Tesco’s. I love the Ocado service and more importantly their quality. However, after months of complaining of how damn expensive they are, I switched to Tesco. Then I spent 3 months complaining how disgustingly tasteless Tesco’s fresh produce are. It was only during in a conversation with a friend, that EUREKA! I’d buy my fresh produce from Ocado and branded household products from Tesco. Err…dumbo!

I’ve never received any marketing proproganda from Ocado. And up until recently, no marketing emails from Tesco. However, about 3 months ago I started receiving weekly marketing and promotional emails from Tesco. This is annoying as it requires two clicks of the mouse to delete these emails. They have even sent petrol vouchers for discounts petrol, which of course is completely useless to me, not unless I get a petrol operated bicycle! I have accumulated over 3000 points with Tesco Club card, but the card is not valid for discount trade off as the card is registered to my previous address. What fuck up rule is that? I’m not even going bother to fight this one, as like the 2 clicks of the mouse, it’s just a damn waste of time.

Astonishingly, I received an email tempting me to buy pet health insurance yesterday. This email, struck a core within me, as Sam (my cat) was hit by a car about two month ago. Lucky Sam survived after two days hospitalisation. The vet bill totalled £660. Ouch ouch ouch. Tesco’s marketing sprill boiled down to was “that’s only 15p per day to insure your pet”.

Is Tesco psychic? No, most definitely not! This is probably just a chain mail they send to all customers. Alternatively, they have an automated computer system that sieves through clients shopping lists, presumably categorising us into product gullibility slots so they can fire more promotional products that we really need.

If so, why can’t their system identify that I have a new address?! Then my mind began to wonder what sort of products they would try to sell to me if I start buying condoms and KY jelly?

How on earth can any other businesses complete with this super giant? They have absolutely no chance.

This is the fundamental problem with UK’s retail sector; there are probably 4 to 5 companies which have the complete monopoly. People do not think twice about other alternatives, but are there really any other alternatives? And if there were alternatives, they would fail miserably as they simply do not have the infracture to provide a complete service. Take Morrison supermarket for example. I’ve only ever been to a Morrison once in my life, whilst visiting a friend in Hull back in the dark ages; however their recent adverts promote British produce and have their trained butchers to prepare your meats however you desire. (Unlike Waitrose which has a butcher counter, but the butcher behind is not really a butcher as he/she is not trained or allowed to touch the meat. They are basically there to pick up a piece of meat (with rubber gloves), place it in a plastic bag, weigh and price it before handing it to you!)

I don’t want my strawberries from South Africa or America, I don’t want my lamb from New Zealand, nor do I desire grapes from Peru. I want British products, or at least European. I’m not a macro-bioticists, I simply want my food fresh! Is that too much to ask? Morrison meets most my culinary expectations, yet is there a Morrison near me? Fat chance! Can I buy online and have my grocery delivered? In my dreams!

A brand new Tesco Express opened this week in the once derelict pub which sits at the bottom end of Heath Road leading up to central Twickenham. Every one seems to be pleased with the new store, as it gives another excuse to spend spend. Spending not for the sake of spending, but really to bulk out  Sunday afternoons. Yes, folks, people go shopping as a hobby, spending the day at a shopping centre like Westfield or Bluewaters is the norm these days. So a walk down to and stroll in Tesco Express would still qualify. Sad gits.

Anyway, the nearby convenience stores (one ran by Indians and the other by a Chinese man) have no chance. We have already seen a Pakistani convenience store down the road gone out of business early 2010. The other two have no doubt been struggling; Tesco Express opening would just be a nail in the coffin.

So what option of independent retailers do we have in Twickenham? Not very much really. Just an extremely over priced fishmonger between M&S food and the post office, a greengrocer which sells rotten vegs and fruits. The butchers went out of business years ago so they tell me. Even the once a week Farmers Market which runs only on Saturdays from the car park behind M&S is desperate to get punters passing. Not surprised, being stuck in the damned car park! There is ample space along the river front, why doesn’t Richmond council move the Farmers Market there or perhaps even to Twickenham Green?

However, there is a ray of hope. On Church Street (which lies just behind Twickenham high street) there is a row of independent businesses. Airy fairy boutiques selling small household furniture and gifts, shoes and clothing. None stock recognisable brands, but all offer something that the High Street doesn’t. There is a tiny 5m2 shop that sells cup cakes (fairy cakes to me and folks born before 1990) it’s an aesthetically perfect shop with its pastel coloured cakes and florals. But a set of 4 thumb sized cupcakes will set you back at £6.00. Still, they offer a great alternative to Gregg. On this road, is also our favourite coffee stop, Sion. It’s a medieval looking delicatessen and coffee bar rolled into one. They have Parma ham from Italy and Chorizo Iberico from Spain. But the best is the hot chocolate, which is served in  a tall glass of boiled milk and the chocolate on a stick. Basically, you have to dip and swirl the chocolate dip into the hot milk to make your drink. It’s a ritual that the kids love. And I like the café as it’s the best place in town for a half-decent coffee. Still very poor by Spanish standard, but heh, we’re in England now, so am not complaining. The antique shop has been abandoned ever since I moved to Twickenham, and there has been a To Let sign in the window for a few months. Just hope that this will be the only To Let sign to go up in this street this year.

I just don’t understand why people fight for individualism and freedom of choice in many aspects of their lives, but subconsciously allowing the Big Brother to rule their daily lives. It just doesn’t make sense.

England has changed almost beyond recognition, the psyche and personas of its people have changed. I just don’t buy the Americanisation of words (e.g. Cupcakes instead of fairy cakes, errands instead of chores) nor the changing of our Britishness. I voted for Labour in the June elections, but in many respects am glad that they did not win. The last Labour government, sold everything we had, our language, our companies, our way of life and more so our individualism.

Take TV for example……..hmm perhaps another day perhaps! Let’s just say, the girls are banned from watching the following programmes:-

Blind Date (new version)

Four Weddings

Come Dine with Me

Friends

Desperate House Wives

Hannah Montana

Zac & Cody

………..basically all American trash!